Thursday, September 16, 2010

Rock and roll over

Thursday, 16 September, 2010 - A shelter near to home had a dog who was convicted of being a dangerous offender, and was sentenced to euthanasia for later this week. Someone has now broken this dog out of prison/shelter, and the dog is free to harm again. It's pretty similar to the revolving door justice we have here in general. How many times has this same dog has been imprisoned and then freed on bail, on a promise to appear, or even pardoned? How many times does a dangerous offender have to be through this cycle before they finally get a sentence that sticks (or sticks in a catheter)?  And an even better question is why would you want to have a dangerous dog in the first place?

My dog has that look... yellow eyes, stripy fur, and a nice big wide head. But, alas, he is a Chesapeake, and cautious of his own shadow. Small dogs terrify him, and cats are a complete unknown. Keep your eye on them, and play dead if they get too close. People are stick/ball/frisbee throwing machines who occasionally also provide food, water and frozen raw turkey necks. He has on occasion caused the odd person to jump back in fear, and each time, I'm not sure who is more startled. Bubba will also jump back and then wag furiously to try and win them over. His 'cousins' include one toddler, and one recently able to reach out and grab munchkin.  They will pull his tail, pull his ears, drape over him, throw balls, and feed him Cheerios. He has yet to so much as take the Cheerio with too much vigor. These are his puppies and he looks after them.  As a pet, my Chessie is as good as it gets. But there are other animals out there that make for good pets are there not?

How about those elongated rats that people keep in cages?  You know the ones I'm talking about.  They are rats fresh out of traction, and by the smell of them, the traction place is somewhere between the downtown eastside, and a pulp and paper mill. They have an odor that not even an owner could love. The point of these critters is beyond my comprehension. (Sorry C, but I never did understand.)

There are Iguanas - who for the most part are all named Iggy.  This is NOT original people. If you are going to have an Iguana, why not name it Klaus, or Sven? I had a goldfish once. I would like to say he was a great pet, but what he lacked in entertainment value, he made up for in sheer determination. I would let this poor fish swim around in dirty water and often forget to feed him. But whenever he was found floating belly up, you could give him a couple of good pokes and he'd wake up, and swim around some more.  Usually, that was when I knew it was time to clean the bowl and give him a snack. The goldfish didn't so much as have a name as he did a sound effect. His 'name' was Glllppp - not quite Gulp... there is no vowels and more of an inhaled throaty sound. If I knew then of this clicking language I might of tried one of their words.

Some people keep birds. Other than a badly tie-dyed poodle, this could be the most colourful of pets. They can be purchased to match any decor. I've gone with a grey/orange theme.  There is a bird out there that would match perfectly. If not for the bird shit that would inevitably hit the ground, the sofa, the divan... I could accessorize nicely with a feathered friend.

When my dog is no longer with me, I will seek to keep a more peaceful, quiet, less demanding pet. You can be sure this won't be a cat, or a rat, or a dog in a hat. I'm seeing something a little more organic, and easy to care for.  I shall not name him Rocky, or Stoner, or Petro, or Sandy, or Bonny, or even Flint. I shall name him George. I'm guessing George will be a little sedimentary, but as far as pet rocks go, G is going to be something special. Perhaps I should start by celebrating Collect Rocks Day. I think George will need to fit in to a pocket to make it easier to slip him in to the office. Rex is a little harder to sneak in, and if I can bring my pet to work, I surely won't need a rock walker or rock sitter. I can't imagine the house without a pet. The good thing about bringing home a new rock is they generally sleep through the night right from the start. No early early morning walks, and no late night strolls. They don't bark, don't scratch the furniture, are house trained, and they don't shed. I don't recommend taking them to the beach. Once they hit the water, they have a tendency to drown. But you can be sure that they won't cause your insurance rates to go up, and they will never turn on you or anyone else. Since the likelihood of them ending up in a shelter for dangerous or violent behaviour is pretty slim, you won't ever have to break them out. Pet Rocks rock.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Add to Technorati Favorites