Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Please do not touch the seats

Wednesday, 14 July 2010 - God love the Kiwi's...and I'm not talking about the fuzzy fruits (although that may indeed be what I'm talking about).  The folks from New Zealand have brought the world many great things... The moa, the kiwi bird, the tattoo, and the All Blacks. Okay, the tattoo might have older roots than this, but the Maori sport tattoos better than any other.  The All Blacks too sport tattoos nicely.

But New Zealand brought us something else that we celebrate today.  Today is World Nude Day... well at least the day it is celebrated here in North America.  In the birth place of the birthday suit day... they celebrate it in February (New Zealand spring is a warmer option than the current winter).  If you are going to hang out with a bunch of Kiwi's (New Zealanders), maybe the All Blacks, why not hang out with them with their kiwis (fuzzy fruits) hanging out (I'm still not talking about the fuzzy fruit).

So what would one do to celebrate such a milestone day?  I checked out the World Nude Day website, to find a contest to rate celebration videos.  Seems celebrators play tennis, do a bit of gymnastics, sing and dance, and for the Canadian entries... do back flips in to snow banks and water ski. Yes, there are just some sports (and some songs) that are hard to watch with the participants naked.  I guess there is something freeing about your girls and your boy out bouncing around like tennis balls.  There is probably something even a little more entertaining about a song and dance sans clothes... after all the songs were sans talent.  The talent on the other hand seemed to be well-equipped.

In some cities, World Nude Day will be celebrated with a nude bike ride, a nude run, a day at the beach...  This past weekend, there was an attempt to break a Guinness World Record for a world wide nude swim.  People stripped down, headed to a local beach and tried to be counted..  Of course the local contingent was at the nude beach (no problems) and a not nude beach (problems).  Imagine being the officers that have to show up and break up that beach barbeque...  "I'm sorry folks, but you are going to have to put your fire out... we are in a high fire alert area.  Oh, and I'm going to need to see some ID".  Where would you keep your ID? What "pocket" would suit best?  Do you carry a Prada bag with you?  Guess there wasn't too many arrests, and certainly not for concealed drugs or weapons.  Not much concealed there.  (Of course if there isn't a high level of grooming... anything is possible).

Personally, I will celebrate briefly while I shower.  I will leave the bigger celebrations, the pandemonium of the clothesless, to others.  I hope that the celebration stays off the public transit system. Its bad enough trying not to touch the handrails and the grab bars. How would you deal with the seats... and the bareness of the bottoms that utilize them?  That would be an entirely new level of chaos... though well suited (ha!) for Pandemonium Day.

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