Tuesday, 6 July 2010 - The internet brought about an entirely new industry of skills and professions. There is graphic web design, there is hosting, there is large data storage and optimization. There are thousands of people who's job is to buy, sell and analyze web advertising. An entire stream of jobs hover around the YouTube site, and don't forget YouTube program hosts. There is internet porn jobs that range from "talent" to downstream sales (not sure that sounds right... but it does sound dirty). The online porn industry probably has a large number of large storage specialists on their rosters... and girls whose names end in "i".
Every type of business in every country can be found online. That means there must be enough webmasters out there to fill a medium sized country. If you were to fill a state with only those webmasters from iPorn you would need Texas. (This might not be that bad a state... with that many iPorn Masters, there would have to be a lot less republicans.) Whatever your business needs are, or your business's focus, your website is no longer a nice-to-have but a must-have.
I don't think I'm the only one that does MOST of my research on anything... tattoos, restaurants, wines, liposuction, gun courses... without going to the internet first. I look up locations, reviews, prices, previous work, maps to get there, and more all before picking up the phone. And ultimately, I only pick up the phone if the company's webmaster hasn't yet built a way for me to communicate quickly online. Can I make a reservation or book an appointment online like I can getting to the geek bar at the Apple store? Can I find out if a table for 6 is available at 19:30? Can I send an image that looks like something I want permanently etched on to my body before I get there? The website is no longer a colourful Yellow Pages ad and I am, quite frankly, offended when that is all I am getting. Give me features. Give me a reason to shut down the computer and see you in person... but not because I'm frustrated that you couldn't answer my questions before hand. I want to see you in person because your pages are fabulous, you understood my wants, and you had some really cool shit on your site.
iPorn sites have an ace in the bag (ooh... another bad reference). When people go to their sites, its pretty clear what they are looking for. They want porn, they want it annonymously, and they want it now. They don't want to then call in, book and appointment, fill out an information form, or even give you a name. If you want a name you are probably going to get some name like John Smith. Hmm... I wonder what is the most common fake name given to a porn site? The webmasters of these sites must have a convention or something. Webmasters of ANY site deserve a little pat on the back once and a while. For good websites, they deserve more than pats. Today is Take Your Webmaster to Lunch Day. If the site is good and you are drawing kudos from your customers and fans... take them somewhere nice. If the site is eh... street meat (hotdogs, not hookers).
Today is also Fried Chicken Day. If your site is of the porn variety, I recommend giving your webmaster a bucket of chicken, delivered... with napkins. A slippery keyboard should be reserved for those late night content changes and bandwidth issues.
I think Republicans are more into porn than you are giving them credit for (just closet cases - in all senses of the term).
ReplyDeleteEwwww on the slippery keyboard.